Going home...
Its almost the end of term and it's two weeks until I leave the campus for a week's break in Mumbai. This has been a strange term- too full is some ways and simply empty in others. I wonder over and over what I'm taking back home with me this time around. And although it sounds a little like The Pessimistic Trip of The Disappointed Soul, I am taking home a heavy heart, weakened resolve, tired body and empty mind.
Yes, I know, quite the list.
Its also that strange and inconvenient time of year when it is tradition to regurgitate the past twelve months so that one can chew the happy times over like cud, spit out the disappointments and digest everything in between. I've always thought it a slightly unnecessary process, though I have to admit, almost inevitable as well. Its almost as if nostalgia and December end were intrinsically linked. Or maybe its just all the celebrations and alcohol.
I begin to think of the happenings from January upwards and stop almost as soon as I've begun. I realize that this entire recall process has certain prerequisites- a little bit of happy, good friends, the proper holiday mood (shorts and vacation reading included), a total break from the campus and fat textbooks looming on the desk (poor things, unwanted and unread), and finally, and most importantly, I need home.
Like I said, this term's been a little rough. The simple thought of venturing to an unknown place nearly scares me right now. All I want is comfort- the comforts of home, of familiar things, the little certainties of friends and loved ones. I guess I just want to go home. Strange, isn't it? I stepped out welcoming the chance of an independent life away from the very same certainties I yearn for today. Teaches me much- one just wants to be taken care of when tired and lost. I'll save the independence for another day.
Yes, I know, quite the list.
Its also that strange and inconvenient time of year when it is tradition to regurgitate the past twelve months so that one can chew the happy times over like cud, spit out the disappointments and digest everything in between. I've always thought it a slightly unnecessary process, though I have to admit, almost inevitable as well. Its almost as if nostalgia and December end were intrinsically linked. Or maybe its just all the celebrations and alcohol.
I begin to think of the happenings from January upwards and stop almost as soon as I've begun. I realize that this entire recall process has certain prerequisites- a little bit of happy, good friends, the proper holiday mood (shorts and vacation reading included), a total break from the campus and fat textbooks looming on the desk (poor things, unwanted and unread), and finally, and most importantly, I need home.
Like I said, this term's been a little rough. The simple thought of venturing to an unknown place nearly scares me right now. All I want is comfort- the comforts of home, of familiar things, the little certainties of friends and loved ones. I guess I just want to go home. Strange, isn't it? I stepped out welcoming the chance of an independent life away from the very same certainties I yearn for today. Teaches me much- one just wants to be taken care of when tired and lost. I'll save the independence for another day.
This entry was posted
on 11.12.06 at 11:26 PM.
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home is where ur heart is .. ur heart is not in this place at this point of time.. you need the break girl .. make sure you are not easy to get in touch with once u reach mumbai
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