The Miscellany Manifesto

Random Musings of a Transient Soul





Rip. Tide.

31.8.08
Just like that, the hand of something large, something momentous and unfathomable, not seen but merely felt, like time or fate, comes over and picks you up from wherever you might be to deposit you to where it deems it is suddenly, unfairly, fair for you to be next. Like the needle abruptly shifting from one record to another, or a drop of ink sucked up and dropped into a clear bowl of water, the newness is sudden and whole. Everything just changes without the need for explanations, dues and pretenses of fair and unfair.


The poetry of past patterns jerked into new designs, cars swerving into each other's lanes, trains jumping tracks. Before you've blinked and your senses have come to their senses, the warp and weft of the net that holds you everyday has ripped and you've fallen through. The edges of everything blur, so new, unrecognizable. And before you know it, the edges of You blur too and you can recognize neither yourself nor where it was you fell from.



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Bored Chocolate-y and Waxy

22.8.08
So grand plans for Kasauli fell through the roof before you could say weekend. And now the next two days are yawning before me with the prospect of too much free time and little activity. Still, it's ironic that it should be worrying me considering how the weekdays pretty much yawn at me in the same fashion. Anyway, there now exists a plan B, which I'm a wee bit alarmed by, but the depths of boredom and self-loathing have been plumbed to such an extent now that I'm honestly willing to do anything just to do something. So a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.

And apparently this girl's gotta do a facial. And then some.

About a month ago when I was quite literally sky-high on my first salary (which has now gone "poof") I decided I'd buy myself anything and everything I wanted just to know what it felt like. Gone are the days of saying "It can wait another day", I thought to myself and commenced on what can only be described as the grandmother of all sprees which eventually led to that hollow, painful "poof" in the bank account. But not before much, much retail therapy was had. Frankly, I have no regrets about that part. But an embarrassingly large portion of that therapy included beauty products and treatments and other beauty what-nots, most of which are lying shamefully unused in my little wardrobe in the PG. (Yes, I've actually thought about returning them. No, Body Shop is only sympathetic towards exploited farmers in poor nations, not greedy, hasty yuppy women with a debit card that has come to life.) Also note, you are not allowed to say mean things about how none of this expensive shit has helped, in case you have seen me lately. (Yes, SM that's meant for you.) God only knows why I waste money on make-up and related crap because that goo rarely touches my face! That might have something to do with aspiration, self-esteem and childhood issues, but it probably has more to do with the fact that it always looks so pretty...

Anyway, so one part of that beauty related retail therapy was a small bomb that I spent at a place alluringly called 'The Beauty Workshop' close to my PG. I don't know what that woman at this salon had put in my 'Welcome Drink' because it sure as hell was responsible for me signing myself up and PAYING IN ADVANCE for some sort of Beauty Bonanza that included things like a Chocolate Facial and a Pedicure with some scary hot wax. No really, I don't know what I was thinking! Considering the fact that my last and only facial bequeathed me a pimple the size of a small country and that I sweat profusely (like, ugly profusely) during pedicures from concentrating REALLY hard on not giggling when women are kneading the soles of my very ticklish feet, it is inexplicable that I would choose to put myself through this- especially when the words chocolate and hot wax are also associated! I insist, it was the welcome drink that made me do it.

Anyway, the deed is done. I've quite literally been avoiding the very thought of these looming 'procedures' for the last month. But I can't avoid it any longer- tomorrow is the day. Nothing special, apparently 'Beauty Bonanza Treatments Must Be Availed Within 45 Days of Payment Being Made'. Who knew these things have expiry dates! So I must now choose between the risk of losing a large chunk of my money or the risk of having another small country bequeathed to me, plus having my feet cook slowly in hot wax. Hmm...

Chasing Creases over Edges




[You know when the bedsheet has a hundred creases running criss-cross over its skin, and you sit down and smooth a hand over them, chase them over the edges with your palm and the surface is placid once again? Well that is what this is about.]

I have an urge to begin with, "I havn't been writing lately..." But I won't even bother. As it is, those words have made an appearance on this blog one too many distressing times. If you could see me now, you'd see shrugged shoulders and both arms raised, hooking the air like question marks, because it just defies me! Like physics or people letting numerology decapitate their names, why I let writing slip is beyond me, especially when I love it so much. It's beyond me. Be-yond.

All those little epiphanies it bought everyday, the bit-by-bit catharsis, that magic feeling of words coming together in my head at the merest hint of something to share on the blog. That feeling one gets when a complete stranger writes in to say a post made their day, or simply "Bless your heart". Or how the awkward patterns of everyday fit together to make a more beautiful picture. Just the simple joy that creating something everyday gave....I don't get why I stopped. So, like I said, beyond me. Which is a far far away place.

So I'm starting again. Because I need to. Like, really.

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I was contemplating "junking" (bad karma, bad karma) this blog altogether and beginning another. Total abandonment. But then some more thought about that and I realized that it wouldn't be any good at all. I'd just be running away from my poor neglected blog, unsung stories and a heap of heaving guilt. (Yes, I know, I have a complex relationship with The Miscellany Manifesto. Told you, really not funny how long I've been meaning to begin being the regular, average blogger again.)


I began writing for me. But soon enough, there were enough eyeballs on this blog to really encourage me to keep going. Now, greedy me, I want that again. Which is what that e-mail/ping was about. It was also about me needing a sharp elbow nudge between my ribs if I fall off the wagon again and stop writing. So help me out, ok? Also, comments solicited on new outrageous template. (Green much?)